The Longest Birthday

Next year, come February, I am dosing everyone on garlic, elderberry, chicken broth, vitC and all things immune boosting.
For I was sick on my birthday. Again.

Last year, I was sick.
The year before i had a miscarriage.
The year before I was not mentally well and doing pretty poorly.
The year before I had a miscarriage.

Tomorrow's another day.
Another day to plan next years birthday party.
O yes I am!
I am going to be old enough to throw my own party just how I please.

Here's to good health and more children in my house before then!

The Great I AM

Simple things - like a worship song.
Small things - like a new hair bow.
Little things - like boys learning to make toast.

They all remind me of how Much I have.
They all remind me of what it means to Love.
They all bring tears to my eyes.

I am so small before The Great I AM.
I am dust.
I will sing.

Lord, Prepare our hearts.

Early Morning Sonshine

A rare event. well, several of them!
We had the pleasure of hearing St Olaf Choir last night.
Swoon. My soul has been salved. Even if we did not get home till nearly 10pm.

This morning, we all slept in.
It was almost magical.
When I finally left my room, I thought I was still the only one awake.
BWAHAHAhahaha.

Two little boys sat on the couch. Each on their own couch. Quietly playing with toys.
One had a baby and blanket and was fussing and fluffing lie a little mother hen.
The other was proclaiming to me how he "hid my fork lift in the rag drawer and Gilead didn't find it. Yay!" with a thumbs up and Dfamily twinkle in his eye.

And so began my day at 6:45.

I have no hopes of repeating this anytime soon.
But I will live on the memory for the next few months.

Orphans Tears

I wake to a new day.
My eyes are gritty.
I want to stay in bed.
I think of all the children.
I was crying in my sleep.

The fog rolls in.
I can see not far beyond my house.
But my heart is nowhere near.
I was crying in my sleep.

Lost.
It's such an empty word.
So filled with big feelings.
I was crying in my sleep.

But the sun is peaking through.
Through big clouds and high over fog.
I wonder about today.
What will it hold?

Lord, prepare out hearts.